


I Inspire You

by Kira_Dattei



Series: Developing Relationship Kinktober 2018 [7]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: AO3 FB Challenge, Canon Compliant, Developing Relationship, Gap Filler, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 13:38:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16220186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kira_Dattei/pseuds/Kira_Dattei
Summary: Shepard doesn't always believe in his own reputation. At least he doesn't need to and Kaidan believes in him plenty without it.





	I Inspire You

**Author's Note:**

> Day 7 of the Developing Relationship Kinktober is here!  
> This one takes place before THAT Question in the Moments Between Missions series, which I'll get organized once October is done and I'm not in the middle of posting more installments. I'd say I'm lazy, but I'm gonna say it doesn't exactly apply when I'm trying to get 31 fics finished. ^_^ So, I say I'm prioritizing my time as wisely as possible.  
> Anyway, enjoy!

Among the many things people called Shepard, “inspiring” was the only one he really had a problem with.

He just did his job, like anyone else; his job just happened to get more attention. And it wasn’t like he wasn’t aware of his accomplishments – choosing to be ignorant didn’t help anyone – he just wished other people who were the reason for his success got more attention.

Namely his crew.

It was always “Shepard” or “the Normandy crew”, never any individuals of the crew.

That was why if one of his crew did something of note on missions, it made the details of his report, no matter if it was an Alliance or Council report. Not being sure if anything would come of it didn’t deter him in the least; if anything, it made him more determined to see credit given where it was due.

Because, in all honesty, it was his friends and crew members who inspired him. He didn’t mean much on his own.

His door’s lock released with the input of his code – so it was Kaidan – and he leaned back from his terminal. He’d been hammering out his report with intermittent distractions of looking at his messages and he’d wondered if his partner was going to make an appearance or get caught up in his own work.

He was happy Kaidan chose to visit.

He was even happier as the biotic walked straight over to him, placed his hands on his shoulders, and leaned over to kiss Shepard on the skin just behind his right ear and then again down his neck a few times. Shepard tilted his head to the side to encourage Kaidan to continue, reaching up with his hand to run his fingers into thick hair damp from a shower.

“You know you could’ve used my shower,” he mused in a relaxed voice.

He felt Kaidan smile against his throat. “Then you’d never get your report done,” he replied, his own deep voice tickling against Shepard’s neck pleasantly. “How close are you to finishing?”

“Very close,” Shepard made the innuendo clear in his teasing tone that Kaidan was used to being subjected to now. Expecting retribution to be a bite, he yelped as Kaidan instead pinched at his shoulder on the left so he hadn’t been ready, surprise more than anything causing the sound. So, he tugged at Kaidan’s hair just a bit and Kaidan followed his hand forward to keep the pressure minimal. Shepard pulled him enough that he could turn and steal a kiss, taking a quick swipe over lips with his tongue before whispering against the lips, “So very close, Kaid.”

Kaidan smiled at him now, the expression showing off his love. “Well, then I’ll leave you to it so we can get even closer.”

The biotic straightened up but Shepard kept hold of his hand so he didn’t leave. “Stick around over here. Talk to me and I won’t need to switch between screens to keep focused.”

“You’re lucky I know you’re telling the truth with that,” Kaidan finished with a grin, then moved to Shepard’s right and sat on the desk off to the side of his terminal.

“You say you know me, then sit in one of my favorite places to be making out with you and expect to be helpful,” Shepard joked even as he went back to the screen and picked up on his progress.

“Right, because this isn’t exactly what you meant,” Kaidan deadpanned. He then leaned forward and went to work removing his boots and setting them further off to the side and rolling out his ankles as they were freed up to the motion, then propped his right foot up on Shepard’s thigh.

After so many months together, they had evened out in who initiated casual contact like this, Kaidan growing more comfortable in their relationship and expressing himself much easier when it had been primarily Shepard in those first few months.

Unsurprisingly, Kaidan used his leg to rest a datapad against and pulled up his own work, the two of them accustomed to this sort of use of time spent together. And Shepard had already seen Kaidan’s report go through so he knew they weren’t doing the same thing.

“Is Vega getting the highlight section of your report?” Kaidan asked after a short silence and Shepard grinned at what Kaidan called his portion where he pointed out exceptional performance of his squad. And Kaidan had even brought it up one day rather than Shepard making a point of telling him he did that, proving how much Kaidan picked up on when it came to paperwork.

“Yeah, he handled things very well. It’s missions like yesterdays that really exemplify why he was selected for N7,” Shepard knew he sounded proud and he didn’t care: he was close to all his crew and didn’t mind showing it, especially to Kaidan who deserved to see his care more than anyone.

“You know, he showed me that tattoo a few days ago, the N7.”

“Oh, he’s performing stripteases for you now?” Shepard asked, adding a dark tone for good measure.

“You’re kidding, right? I’ve seen him shirtless as often as I’ve seen you.” Shepard believed it: the Lieutenant like to spar with Kaidan and usually lost his shirt at some point and that was on top of both men living in the crew’s quarters where you just got used to seeing others in there in various states of undress. “But I mean he actually purposefully showed it to me, wanted me to know what he was looking forward to after the war.”

“Good of him to still be looking that far,” Shepard said honestly.

“Do you? Look that far? Try to see past the Reapers?” Kaidan asked, his tone shifting a little.

Shepard wrapped his fingers around Kaidan’s ankle, sliding up under the hem of his pants in a caress. “I do now.” Shepard caught the content smile Kaidan gave behind his datapad.

“You know you made a difference to him, to Vega,” Kaidan continued and Shepard felt himself close off a bit. He knew Kaidan was another person he’d influenced in the time they’d known each other, for better and worse, but the biotic tended to hedge the subject since he was aware Shepard wasn’t a fan of the attention.

“I know. He talked to me about it soon after we left Earth. But it was still his decision.”

Kaidan nudged at him with his foot to get Shepard to look at him, waiting to speak until Shepard did. “You get why that’s the big deal, right?” Shepard knew he looked confused. “The reason people call you an inspiration is because you encourage them to exercise their greatest right: the right to choose for themselves. You don’t take away their options, but lay them out for them and help them see what they need in order to come to their own answer. A lot of people in positions of authority find it easier to just tell everyone what to do."

That was, admittedly, not something Shepard thought as being such a big deal. Yes, he knew what it was like to be in a position of bad options being the only options, more from his years growing up on the streets, but that wasn’t so profound to others.

And, of course, Kaidan understood that. So much of his life had been made up of choices he didn’t get that affected his life in huge ways and then the choices he did get ending up causing nothing but pain.

Even Shepard himself had ended up being one of those kinds of choices for Kaidan, no matter how happy they were being together now.

Shepard finished off his report as a way to buy himself a bit of time, setting it to send off to the usual list of recipients before gratefully turning his full attention to Kaidan. He felt like this was something Kaidan had been sitting on for a while and he wanted to hear him out without distraction.

Kaidan noticed his shift and set his datapad on the desk.

“You think if I forced my way around the galaxy, demanded results out of everyone, I wouldn’t get the attention?”

“Oh, you’d get attention, just not the same kind. And your reputation would be much different. I don’t think it would be one of respect, but plenty would be afraid of you. Which, I guess would have its merits.” Kaidan hesitated, seeming to need to collect himself a little. Then he admitted, “I wouldn’t be here,” and Shepard understood why he’d needed the pause. The two of them together had become such an integral part of them that for it not to exist was a disturbing thought. “We all respect you because even without you demanding the best of us, you still bring it out. _That’s_ why you’re an inspiration.”

Shepard guessed that was a much nicer way of thinking about things. He could not have a problem with that and he did see the truth in it. It was certainly less egotistical and more happenstance than people let on, which was more accurate.

Shifting his hold on Kaidan’s ankle, he used the hold to pull his chair closer to the biotic, then pulled on Kaidan’s leg to extend over his legs and kept pulling until Kaidan – with an exaggerated roll of his eyes – slid off the desk and into Shepard’s lap, leaving his other foot on the floor to take some of his weight as he settled into place atop Shepard.

Shepard stretched up a bit to kiss at Kaidan’s mouth without deepening it, his hands massaging at the biotic’s sides to keep from reaching around and groping his ass like he really enjoyed doing. He’d get to that.

“I guess it’s a good thing I’ve got someone who makes me want to be a good person. So, you get to be an inspiration to an inspiration. How does that feel?”

Kaidan’s hands slid up Shepard’s chest to rest on either side of his neck, fingers over his pulse. “Like I better not screw up or I’ll take out the galaxy by proxy.”

Shepard smirked against Kaidan’s skin. “Good, you do understand. Don’t worry, Kaid: I believe in you. You earned the high opinion I have of you.”

“Not sure how much I believe you when you’re unhooking my belt to get your hand on my ass,” Kaidan replied, his voice getting lighter as his breathing sped up a little at Shepard’s attentions. “You might be a little biased at the moment.”

“When it comes to you, I’m always biased. No one compares.”

He swore he could actually hear Kaidan putting together a counter-argument so he cut that off by finally taking a deep kiss like he wanted, pressing his tongue into Kaidan’s mouth and rolling his hips up while pulling down on Kaidan’s hips to grind them together, feeling smug when he got a low groan from his partner.

And Kaidan followed his lead without hesitation, just as he always did because Shepard had earned his trust.

That would always be important to Shepard.

So, even as they shed clothes on their way further into his quarters, ending up on a couch with Kaidan remaining straddled across his hips for the duration of their lovemaking, keeping the pace slow as Shepard usually had a hard time doing because he just got too worked up, Shepard remained fully aware of how much this man meant to him.

And he hadn’t lied: he was looking further out into the future now, wanting to reach it with Kaidan Alenko.

It was time he thought about moving toward it a little more actively, allow Kaidan to inspire him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed.  
> The next day for these guys in Kinktober with be tomorrow!


End file.
